Your Children Have Never Heard Of
It’s that time of year again, when parents and grandparents alike find themselves flocking to stores, scrambling and racking their brains trying to find that perfect gift. These days that goal seems increasingly unattainable. Kids today have seen it all and are easily bored with the latest toys and gadgets. What will you get them this time? Another gaming system? A new selfie stick? A set of Magna-Tiles? Why not give them gifts that are so special, so exclusive, that they are not even found in stores! The Jewish Echo has compiled a list of one-of-a-kind gift ideas that we are sure your kids have never touched, seen, or heard of ever before. Light up their Festival of Lights with presents that will surely make them stand out from the crowd.
Forget USB sticks and Zip drives. Give your kids the gift of a bendable floppy disc, which can hold a whopping 1.44 megabytes of data. Instead of saving all your materials on your desktop or ROM cartridges, your child can now isolate a few select pictures or documents on individual discs. They can now own a collection of floppy discs, and maybe even trade them with friends. Users need to be careful not to touch the magnetic strip and keep it away from heat, cold, and moisture. Even fingerprints can damage the sensitive coating but don’t worry, even if damaged there are still other uses for the floppy discs. They can make nifty coasters, for example.
Unlike today’s smartphones with all their fancy features, the exciting thing about a rotary phone is that you never know who is calling! Every ring is an adventure and surprise. Who is calling? Bubby? Your aunt? A Nigerian prince who desperately needs your financial help? Kids can have fun dialing their friends while fingering small holes on a rotating numerical disc. Another bonus is that it comes with a long cord, but don’t worry about it taking up too much space, as the wire is just long enough to reach a few feet before knocking down everything that gets caught in its curly web. The phone can never be dropped or lost as it is drilled into a wall. It comes with a sturdy headset that may aggravate the user’s neck as they struggle to hold the receiver with their shoulder so they can talk while doing tasks, but on the plus side, think of the break your thumbs will get from texting. The rotary phone is durable and long-lasting with no need to recharge. In fact, it will even work during a power outage.
Everyone has the latest smartphone in their back pocket; nothing cool about that anymore. But what if your kid had an illuminating buzzing beeper to let him know that you’re trying to get ahold of him? Beepers, or pagers as they are sometimes called, are still used today by some in the medical field. Why should your child be left out of the fun? Sure, they ignore your calls now, but it will be hard to ignore them on a pulsating device that lights up every time you call. Instead of silly acronyms like LOL or OMG, you can page them cool codes like 07734, which spells out “hello” when viewed upside down, or 143 which for some reason implies “I love you.” Because paging networks have more broadcasting power than those of cellphones, their signals are better at penetrating buildings. You won’t be hearing any more lame excuses that your call went straight to voicemail due to poor reception.
Your child can now enjoy a song recording on magnetic tape. Instead of skipping to preferred tracks, the cassette tape allows your child the gift of concentrating on one song at a time. If he wants to skip ahead, there is always that fast-forward button – but he must use it carefully, lest he skip the song completely. Cassettes are not just good for playing music; they can also record voices! Cassette recorders have an awesome feature that allows your child to transform his voice to that of a squeaky chipmunk by pressing on the play and fast-forward button simultaneously. If the tape gets mishandled, you can always make use of the curly strips for wrapping ribbon or sukkah decorations. A pencil would be handy along with this gift to avoid that situation.
Imagine having a calculator, calendar, and pulse tracker all wrapped into a watch. Who needs sleek and streamlined designs when you can carry a mini computer on your wrist? This watch has tiny rubber buttons on a large face screen, so everyone within 10 feet will know your child is the proud owner of a Casio C-80. It can also store phone numbers and convert currency in case your child needs to flee to another country.
Why bother investing in the latest, pricey gadgets when your kid will deem them obsolete next month? These simple box cameras, produced by innovative companies like Fuji, Kodak, and SunFlash, use fixed-focus lenses to capture life’s momentous moments. The great thing about these cameras is that they are one- time use only, so you need not worry about your children getting bored with them. There is also no need to make multiple trips to the store to have the film developed as the camera is deposited for processing together with the film.
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